I ended my fast yesterday--three days early! God is not only on time but sometimes He's early! I got the answers I needed and so fasting without purpose is just starving!
It was a truly awesome experience and I am so proud of myself for being able to stick with it. I passed up Dunkin Donuts, Dairy Queen and countless other things because I was so desperate to hear from God and to grow closer to Him. I so enjoy those intimate times of really "getting after it" in private prayer and the sweet times of corporate prayer and worship with my church family.
With some of the things I was seeking answers to, I felt God's answer early on. Other things took a little longer and mostly I wanted to be sure it was from Him and not my own ideas. But over and over I got the same confirmation.
I know I'm probably not doing the experience justice in my feeble attempts to describe it to you, my faithful readers. It's just not something that I can explain adequately. You just have to step out on faith and experience it for yourself. But I do want to caution you, just because you don't get the answers you want does not mean God isn't listening. So don't get frustrated and give up. Be patient and trust Him. Some of my answers weren't exactly what I expected to hear but I know that His ways are so much better than mine!
Yesterday also marked the end of a promise I made to myself six months ago to quit drinking like I had been and to not date for six months. I have reached a point now where I have no desire to do either really. I personally don't think there is anything wrong with consuming alcohol in moderation. I see it as a personal conviction issue really. It's just not something God spends a whole lot of time thinking about. As my Pastor says, God thinks about YOU! And if He can get you, He'll talk to you about everything else. Anything that stands in the way of your relationship with Him or hurts your witness to others, is wrong. But that can be a LOT of things not just alcohol. But as for me, I just don't need it or even want it anymore.
As for dating, I honestly don't have the time! Between church activities, working full-time, the kids and school, I don't have the energy to give to another person and I refuse to casually date. In fact, that was one of the things I asked God about during my fast and He repeatedly showed me that He is a God of restoration. I still deeply love my ex-husband, despite the tumultuous past three years. Restoration may not mean reconciliation for us. But until God completely shuts that door, I will wait on Him. And if it is not to be, I trust God to bring about the right, godly man in due time. I'm in no hurry. I'm content to serve the Lord as a single woman.
Content. Being satisfied with what one has and not wanting anything else. I guess by that definition, I am more than just content. I am truly happy. I am in love with my life--every minute of it.
I am excited about serving as co-leader for a LIFE group and helping out with DivorceCare--two ministries I wholeheartedly believe in. I am excited in serving in other ways also--prison ministry, events, and outreach.
I am excited for my children and the things that are coming up in their lives--clogging competition, spring musical, dance team tryouts, dance recitals, proms, graduations, starting college, finishing college, getting new cars, etc. I am so very proud of all three of them not just for their accomplishments but for the individuals that they are and are becoming.
I am excited about my second semester of Grad school and that I'm doing so much better than I ever expected that I could.
I am excited about the job God has lined up for me in the future. I don't know what or where it is yet but I know I will be mentoring people and helping them become the best they can be.
I am excited about writing a book (actually three books) and I know that when I am done, God will have investors and publishers lined up to make the dream come true. But I'm not even concerned with making any money from them. I am truly writing them to help others.
I am excited about spending time with friends and family--the Steven Curtis Chapman concert, the MercyMe/Jamie Grace concert, the Kari Jobe concert, movies, trips to see friends in other states, vacations with family, clogging competition trips and mission trips.
I am excited about the healing in my knees that I've been promised! I'm looking forward to working with my doctor and chiropractor as well as new diet and exercise routines for optimum health.
I am excited about the healing my parents are going to get and their return to prosperity!
I am excited about everything God is going to do, not just in my life but in the lives of my family, friends, church family and everyone that we are able to touch.
I am excited about all of these good things and more. I know that life will not always be perfect. But I know the One who is and more than that, He knows me and He cares about what I care about! And He cares about you, too! Be blessed!
Friday, January 24, 2014
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
A new beginning...
Sunday night I did something I have been contemplating for a few months--since before I started this new blog:
Yes, I made the decision to be rebaptized!
I know most people who have been baptized before don't feel the need to do it again when they rededicate their lives to the Lord. But I did. I prayed about it for quite some time and I concluded the when I was baptized the first time, it wasn't for the right reasons. And it didn't signify a change or a new life.
For all who are in Christ are a new creation--the old has gone away. 2 Corinthians 5:17
I chose not to make a huge announcement of the decision and only invited family and close friends. I was honored that my LIFE group leaders, James and Teresa were there as well as Donna who has faithfully prayed me through the last three years and my three amazing children! I wanted God to be glorified not me and so I chose to keep it somewhat private (as private as a baptism at Church of the Highlands can be anyway!) My life is no longer about me but about what He wants for me.
And so now, it truly is a new beginning!
I know most people who have been baptized before don't feel the need to do it again when they rededicate their lives to the Lord. But I did. I prayed about it for quite some time and I concluded the when I was baptized the first time, it wasn't for the right reasons. And it didn't signify a change or a new life.
For all who are in Christ are a new creation--the old has gone away. 2 Corinthians 5:17
I chose not to make a huge announcement of the decision and only invited family and close friends. I was honored that my LIFE group leaders, James and Teresa were there as well as Donna who has faithfully prayed me through the last three years and my three amazing children! I wanted God to be glorified not me and so I chose to keep it somewhat private (as private as a baptism at Church of the Highlands can be anyway!) My life is no longer about me but about what He wants for me.
And so now, it truly is a new beginning!
Sunday, January 12, 2014
What I'm Reading Right now
It is such a blessing that I love to read! In addition to the many reading assignments for graduate school, I am also reading my Daniel Fast daily devotional, the One-Year Bible, and two books I picked up just recently.
The first is the non-fiction, Single and Loving It by Kate McVeigh. I don't know that I will always be single but while I am, I want to live my single life to the fullest, taking advantage of everything God has for single people who can fully devote themselves to Him.
The other is the fictional book The Wishing Tree by Marybeth Whalen. According to the cover, it's about a woman in marital crisis who returns to her hometown to help plan her sister's wedding and ultimately must examine her dreams for her own future and what true love should be.
Day 8 of the Daniel Fast and other things...
I am happy to say I am of Day 8 of the Daniel Fast and after the modifications I made on Day 2, I am still going strong. However, with the modifications I'm not sure I'm still supposed to be calling it an actual "Daniel Fast" but I am anyway, for lack of a better, more concise term.
I did the real thing for two days and it was hard! I had no idea how dependent my body is on caffeine. I thought I could do it cold turkey and be over it in just a few days but not possible. If I ever do decide to give up caffeine completely, it will have to be done in baby steps. Still, I want the experience to be as close as possible to the real thing so I only allow myself coffee in the mornings. Most days, I can handle just one cup. Some days, two is required. But that is the only caffeine I allow myself. No soda, no tea (and I really do miss my sweet tea!), but only water! So I don't think that's too bad.
The other modification I had to make was to add dairy back. Not much but a little. I was okay with the almond milk in my cereal. But I needed a little cheese and a little sour cream on a few things to make me able to stick to the main theme of the plan--no meats, sweets or breads.
So I am on day 8 with no meats, sweets, or leavened bread and I feel fantastic. I have a deep appreciation for the majority of the world that survives solely on beans and/or rice! It has made me much more appreciative to live where I do--in the land of plenty! It also makes me more sensitive to those that don't appreciate though and I am ever so irritated with people that have been complaining about their lack of choices when it comes to restaurants in their area. Seriously, people? But I digress. First world problems, what can you do? (shaking my head)
The 21 days of prayer has been awesome. Except for Wednesday when my alarm didn't go off for some reason, I've tuned in online every morning to the services at 6 a.m. and actually went to Saturday morning prayer. Now that it's not so cold, I plan to make it to the church every morning at 6 a.m. because as it is with our other services, watching online is great when you can't make it but it's no substitute for actually being there. Yesterday, I did not pray for one thing for myself but instead took several of the prayer cards off the table and prayed over each one of those. How humbling it is to see the needs of others and what a privilege it was to pray for each person.
I prayed for a few families expecting a child. I prayed for several that needed financial assistance. I prayed for some battling addictions and even prayed for one of the prisoners we ministered to and his needs. And before I knew it, I was out of time...and God had given me a whole new perspective for my own prayer needs.
For the main thing I am praying for, His promise is still there but I am reminded it's on His timeline, not mine. And my first prayer needs to be not for reconciliation but for his salvation. That is most important because though it wasn't God's intention for us to ever be divorced, now that we are, I cannot be unequally yoked. So if we are to be reconciled (and only God knows that for sure, I completely trust Him to show me), he first has to become a believer. I don't know his heart and I never did. I only know by his actions. That is why it is so important for us believers to make our actions match our words--not so we can earn anything from God. But so that others will see our good works and praise our Father in Heaven and can recognize that we are His followers. See Matthew 5:16 and Matthew 7:16.
I am so excited about the possibility of co-leading a LIFE (Living in Freedom Everyday) group this semester! I attended LIFE Leader training Tuesday night and put my name down as a co-leader looking for a leader. It just depends on whether or not anyone leading needs help on the nights that I am available. If not, I will just join another small group, possibly repeating the LIFE group with someone else. I believe in that curriculum. It has made so much difference in my life but I attribute most of that to the group God led me to this past semester as well as the retreat. Indeed, people kept telling me that the retreat was the biggest part of it and I never understood why until I went. But the twelve weeks of group meetings are only half of the LIFE experience. The retreat really makes the biggest difference and I know this because this was my third time to try and do LIFE! I promise, LIFE will change your life!
I also plan to repeat Divorce Care on Sunday evenings because I missed a few of the sessions last semester and I have really bonded with the other members. I also have a strong desire to minister to other divorced people, particularly women. I also encourage anyone who is divorced (no matter how long it's been), separated or even thinking about divorce to take advantage of this ministry. There are classes everywhere and you only need to visit Divorce Care to find a group in your area.
I wish I was able to join some of the recreational small groups that we have but with Graduate school starting back already, I am realistic about the amount of free time that I have. I am really excited about the courses I am taking this time. I have two classes with a few of the people I met last semester and am looking forward to working with them again.
Things are going pretty well at work also. It's no secret that it's not what I want to do for the rest of my life, otherwise I would not be seeking my MBA. But the other temp and I met with the manager last week and we are guaranteed employment through the end of February, possibly longer, because of some campaigns we'll be working on so I'm happy about that. The low stress of the job helps balance everything else going on in my life right now. That also seems to confirm what God has been telling me about my job also, as well as my own common sense.
The girls are doing well and things have been so much more peaceful at home lately and for that I just praise God! Brooke is all excited about her theater audition and dance team tryouts and Kayti is looking forward to clogging competition, the prom, graduation and getting ready for UA. It's fun watching their excitement and joining in their joy. But I continue to pray that God will draw them close to Him and that they will trust Him for guidance in their lives. It is an important lesson that I didn't learn until just recently and I am hoping and praying that they grasp it much sooner than I did.
Dylan is doing well also. He got a huge raise at work (he is already working as an Engineer even though he's only a Junior) and his course load is overwhelming to me but to hear him talk it seems right up his alley, even though his spare time will be largely devoted to homework. He is also trying to start a special project group to design something special and I won't share the details publicly because I think it's a highly competitive field. I probably wouldn't get the details right anyway--he is so much smarter than me with regard to physics, etc. My knowledge of physics ends with my understanding of gravity and the effects it is having on my body!
Our fur babies are also doing great! Mady is her usual loving and hyper self and Lacy has calmed down a great deal since she was spayed. She has also gotten very fat! But she continues to scratch my couch even though she has a scratching post. Good thing I'm not very fond of this couch and will soon be replacing it. But before I do we have to get her scratching under control. I am going to try Soft Paws before we consider having her declawed. I hope it works because I really don't want to have her declawed. But I can't replace furniture every few years either!
All in all, we are very blessed! I hope you are as well! If I can pray for you in any way, please email me and let me know. It's my honor and privilege to do so!
I did the real thing for two days and it was hard! I had no idea how dependent my body is on caffeine. I thought I could do it cold turkey and be over it in just a few days but not possible. If I ever do decide to give up caffeine completely, it will have to be done in baby steps. Still, I want the experience to be as close as possible to the real thing so I only allow myself coffee in the mornings. Most days, I can handle just one cup. Some days, two is required. But that is the only caffeine I allow myself. No soda, no tea (and I really do miss my sweet tea!), but only water! So I don't think that's too bad.
The other modification I had to make was to add dairy back. Not much but a little. I was okay with the almond milk in my cereal. But I needed a little cheese and a little sour cream on a few things to make me able to stick to the main theme of the plan--no meats, sweets or breads.
So I am on day 8 with no meats, sweets, or leavened bread and I feel fantastic. I have a deep appreciation for the majority of the world that survives solely on beans and/or rice! It has made me much more appreciative to live where I do--in the land of plenty! It also makes me more sensitive to those that don't appreciate though and I am ever so irritated with people that have been complaining about their lack of choices when it comes to restaurants in their area. Seriously, people? But I digress. First world problems, what can you do? (shaking my head)
The 21 days of prayer has been awesome. Except for Wednesday when my alarm didn't go off for some reason, I've tuned in online every morning to the services at 6 a.m. and actually went to Saturday morning prayer. Now that it's not so cold, I plan to make it to the church every morning at 6 a.m. because as it is with our other services, watching online is great when you can't make it but it's no substitute for actually being there. Yesterday, I did not pray for one thing for myself but instead took several of the prayer cards off the table and prayed over each one of those. How humbling it is to see the needs of others and what a privilege it was to pray for each person.
I prayed for a few families expecting a child. I prayed for several that needed financial assistance. I prayed for some battling addictions and even prayed for one of the prisoners we ministered to and his needs. And before I knew it, I was out of time...and God had given me a whole new perspective for my own prayer needs.
For the main thing I am praying for, His promise is still there but I am reminded it's on His timeline, not mine. And my first prayer needs to be not for reconciliation but for his salvation. That is most important because though it wasn't God's intention for us to ever be divorced, now that we are, I cannot be unequally yoked. So if we are to be reconciled (and only God knows that for sure, I completely trust Him to show me), he first has to become a believer. I don't know his heart and I never did. I only know by his actions. That is why it is so important for us believers to make our actions match our words--not so we can earn anything from God. But so that others will see our good works and praise our Father in Heaven and can recognize that we are His followers. See Matthew 5:16 and Matthew 7:16.
I am so excited about the possibility of co-leading a LIFE (Living in Freedom Everyday) group this semester! I attended LIFE Leader training Tuesday night and put my name down as a co-leader looking for a leader. It just depends on whether or not anyone leading needs help on the nights that I am available. If not, I will just join another small group, possibly repeating the LIFE group with someone else. I believe in that curriculum. It has made so much difference in my life but I attribute most of that to the group God led me to this past semester as well as the retreat. Indeed, people kept telling me that the retreat was the biggest part of it and I never understood why until I went. But the twelve weeks of group meetings are only half of the LIFE experience. The retreat really makes the biggest difference and I know this because this was my third time to try and do LIFE! I promise, LIFE will change your life!
I also plan to repeat Divorce Care on Sunday evenings because I missed a few of the sessions last semester and I have really bonded with the other members. I also have a strong desire to minister to other divorced people, particularly women. I also encourage anyone who is divorced (no matter how long it's been), separated or even thinking about divorce to take advantage of this ministry. There are classes everywhere and you only need to visit Divorce Care to find a group in your area.
I wish I was able to join some of the recreational small groups that we have but with Graduate school starting back already, I am realistic about the amount of free time that I have. I am really excited about the courses I am taking this time. I have two classes with a few of the people I met last semester and am looking forward to working with them again.
Things are going pretty well at work also. It's no secret that it's not what I want to do for the rest of my life, otherwise I would not be seeking my MBA. But the other temp and I met with the manager last week and we are guaranteed employment through the end of February, possibly longer, because of some campaigns we'll be working on so I'm happy about that. The low stress of the job helps balance everything else going on in my life right now. That also seems to confirm what God has been telling me about my job also, as well as my own common sense.
The girls are doing well and things have been so much more peaceful at home lately and for that I just praise God! Brooke is all excited about her theater audition and dance team tryouts and Kayti is looking forward to clogging competition, the prom, graduation and getting ready for UA. It's fun watching their excitement and joining in their joy. But I continue to pray that God will draw them close to Him and that they will trust Him for guidance in their lives. It is an important lesson that I didn't learn until just recently and I am hoping and praying that they grasp it much sooner than I did.
Dylan is doing well also. He got a huge raise at work (he is already working as an Engineer even though he's only a Junior) and his course load is overwhelming to me but to hear him talk it seems right up his alley, even though his spare time will be largely devoted to homework. He is also trying to start a special project group to design something special and I won't share the details publicly because I think it's a highly competitive field. I probably wouldn't get the details right anyway--he is so much smarter than me with regard to physics, etc. My knowledge of physics ends with my understanding of gravity and the effects it is having on my body!
Our fur babies are also doing great! Mady is her usual loving and hyper self and Lacy has calmed down a great deal since she was spayed. She has also gotten very fat! But she continues to scratch my couch even though she has a scratching post. Good thing I'm not very fond of this couch and will soon be replacing it. But before I do we have to get her scratching under control. I am going to try Soft Paws before we consider having her declawed. I hope it works because I really don't want to have her declawed. But I can't replace furniture every few years either!
All in all, we are very blessed! I hope you are as well! If I can pray for you in any way, please email me and let me know. It's my honor and privilege to do so!
Friday, January 3, 2014
21 Days of Prayer and Fasting
My church, Church of the Highlands, begins every year with 21 days of prayer and fasting beginning with the first Sunday of the year. As Pastor Chris explained, when the Lord was leading Him to start the church almost 14 years ago, it started with him fasting and praying about it for the FIRST 21 days of the year. My church feels so strongly about tithing and not just the money but it's about giving God the FIRST of everything. It shows priority. It's not so much about the amounts but showing God where He is in your heart. And every year since the church began, they have continued this "tradition" (for lack of a better word) and every year God has grown the church exponentially. Not only that but our resources always seem to multiply. He firmly believes, as do I, it's a direct result of the priority we corporately and collectively place on the importance of God. I have only been a member of Church of the Highlands since about 2009 and then shortly thereafter, I went through my divorce and my life was kinda topsy-turvy for awhile. So this will be my first year to fully participate and to say I am excited about it is an understatement!
Coming off the Fall semester of LIFE and the LIFE retreat, I am more on fire for God than I ever have been in my life. You can read in previous blogs about how I'd always felt like I was holding a part of myself back from God because I didn't want certain things to change. I didn't trust Him completely. Well, December 14, 2013, I went ALL IN. And I now know what real joy is. It isn't the absence of problems, it's the peace in the presence of them. At the retreat, I was prayed over many times individually and anointed with oil repeatedly. And I asked to receive all that He has for me. I fully expect to get clarity and direction from God in so many areas of my life but also to join my brothers and sisters in Christ in believing Him for abundance in reaching the lost and helping the hurting. Every time I hear a new testimony, I am blown away by the power of God.
Fasting is not a trend or a fad but a powerful way to access God in an intimate and authentic relationship, receive answers to prayers and gain a fresh touch from our Heavenly Father (Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast) It's about consecrating, or setting apart a time specifically for the purpose of hearing from and growing closer to God. When you weaken the body and soul, you strengthen the spirit. How cool is that?
Now, I used to think that fasting just meant "giving up something" in a way to identify with the sacrifice of Christ. That's a good idea. But true fasting is always about food. The definition of a biblical fast is "to restrict food for a spiritual purpose". The Hebrew word for fast is tsowm which means "to cover the mouth" and the Greek word for fast is nesteuo, which means "to abstain from food". Whenever fasts are mentioned in the Bible, they are accompanied with a spiritual issue. Therefore, giving up television or social media for a period of time might be a good decision, it is not a fast. (Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast)
There are three types of fasts mentioned in the Bible:
1) an absolute fast--practiced by Moses (Exodus 34:28) where he ate nothing and drank nothing for 40 days and nights. Rarely is this practiced for a long period of time because of physical and long-term complications.
2) a normal fast--where one drinks water or light juices only. This was practiced by both Elijah (1 Kings 19:8) and Jesus (Matthew 4)
3) a partial fast--when some foods are consumed but others are restricted which is what was done by Daniel and John the Baptist (Matthew 3:4)
(Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast)
I am doing the Daniel Fast but I am doing a modified version. I am giving up meat, dairy and all animal by-products, leavened breads and all drinks except water. But the Daniel Fast as strictly interpreted by Gregory, also calls for no processed foods or chemicals. I can't realistically be successful with this. I have prayed about this and talked about it with a good Christian friend and we agree--God knows my heart. I will read labels and do my best but with limited time and income to purchase some of the items in her recipes, I'm just going to be eating a lot of salad, potatoes, brown rice and flatbread! I'm still giving up a lot of FOOD!
My pastor also gave the following outline for doing a fast:
b. Ask for forgiveness
c. Refocus on the eternal
d. Invite the presence of God in our lives
e. Believe God to answer specific needs.
2. Decide what type of fast you will do.
3. Expect results
Isaiah 58:8-9
Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your holiness[a] will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. “If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
We also have a corporate prayer focus by day:
Sunday - Our Hearts
(2 Chronicles 16:9) For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the
earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.
Make worship and prayer the priority of your life. Declare your complete dependence on God. Ask for a renewed passion for His presence and fresh revelation of His Word.
Monday - Our Purpose
(Colossians 1:28-29) We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me.
Our purpose is the Great Commission. Pray for people to be saved, connected in a local church, discipled, and fulfilled in their ministry.
Tuesday - Our Nation, State, and City
(1 Timothy 2:1-2) I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone--for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.
Pray for America and the leaders of our country. Pray for Alabama and the cities of Birmingham, Auburn, Tuscaloosa, and Montgomery. Pray for the Governor, the state legislature, courts, mayors and other city
officials, schools, police departments, and churches.
Wednesday - Our Points of Passion
(Matthew 9:37-38) The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask
the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.
Pray for our local missions efforts (Dream Center and prisons), national church planting (ARC), and our international missions efforts.
Thursday - Our Family
(Acts 16:31) Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved--you and your household.
Pray for God's blessing on your family (spouse, children, grandchildren, grandparents, parents, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins, etc.)
Friday - Our Needs
(Philippians 4:6-7) Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Believe God for answered prayer to your specific needs (finances,relationships, health, family members to be saved and other personal needs.)
Saturday - Our Church
(Ephesians 3:20-21) Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Pray for Church of the Highlands and the ministry that will take place this year. Pray for Pastor Chris and his family, along with the other staff members, small group leaders, and those on the Dream Team.
We have services every weekday morning at 6 a.m. and Saturday morning at 9 a.m. (also streamed live online but I'm going to make every effort to actually get up and go!)
As for my specific needs, I am believing that God will show me:
1) in which direction I should steer my heart with regard to dating/relationships. Should I continue to hope for reconciliation? Or should I open my heart to receive a new, Christian mate, if that is what God has for me? Or do I need to continue to wait on this issue?
2) in which direction I should steer my body for healing in my knees. Should I continue with traditional western medicine? Or seek the help of a chiropractor or acupuncturist? If I stick with western medicine, do I continue with shots or give into surgery? But I do believe it's His plan to heal them so I can lose more weight and be healthy enough to serve Him in radical ways (yes, I'm starting to feel a calling coming on)
3) in which direction I should steer myself with regards to my job. I'm committed to being here until the end of February at least because first, I don't want to make any major decisions or changes during the fast and second, I want to get at least six months of this "temporary assignment" for purposes of longevity in a court proceeding. But after that, do I continue here because it's relatively low stress and provides time for me to work on study or do I start to pursue other opportunities and if so, which ones?
4) how to become a more disciplined tither and to gain better control over my finances. For the first time in a long time I've moved from "struggling, living paycheck to paycheck" to "survival, living month to month" and that feels good but not good enough. I am attending the Financial Freedom conference at church Saturday and have been promised to come away with a written plan of action that is doable. So that's a start!
Those are the main things. It's important to note that a fast doesn't change God's mind about something. I used to think that was the case--people fasted in order to get something from God. But it's about aligning our spirit with His Holy Spirit. And I would covet your prayers to see that this happens.
Be blessed!
Coming off the Fall semester of LIFE and the LIFE retreat, I am more on fire for God than I ever have been in my life. You can read in previous blogs about how I'd always felt like I was holding a part of myself back from God because I didn't want certain things to change. I didn't trust Him completely. Well, December 14, 2013, I went ALL IN. And I now know what real joy is. It isn't the absence of problems, it's the peace in the presence of them. At the retreat, I was prayed over many times individually and anointed with oil repeatedly. And I asked to receive all that He has for me. I fully expect to get clarity and direction from God in so many areas of my life but also to join my brothers and sisters in Christ in believing Him for abundance in reaching the lost and helping the hurting. Every time I hear a new testimony, I am blown away by the power of God.
Fasting is not a trend or a fad but a powerful way to access God in an intimate and authentic relationship, receive answers to prayers and gain a fresh touch from our Heavenly Father (Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast) It's about consecrating, or setting apart a time specifically for the purpose of hearing from and growing closer to God. When you weaken the body and soul, you strengthen the spirit. How cool is that?
Now, I used to think that fasting just meant "giving up something" in a way to identify with the sacrifice of Christ. That's a good idea. But true fasting is always about food. The definition of a biblical fast is "to restrict food for a spiritual purpose". The Hebrew word for fast is tsowm which means "to cover the mouth" and the Greek word for fast is nesteuo, which means "to abstain from food". Whenever fasts are mentioned in the Bible, they are accompanied with a spiritual issue. Therefore, giving up television or social media for a period of time might be a good decision, it is not a fast. (Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast)
There are three types of fasts mentioned in the Bible:
1) an absolute fast--practiced by Moses (Exodus 34:28) where he ate nothing and drank nothing for 40 days and nights. Rarely is this practiced for a long period of time because of physical and long-term complications.
2) a normal fast--where one drinks water or light juices only. This was practiced by both Elijah (1 Kings 19:8) and Jesus (Matthew 4)
3) a partial fast--when some foods are consumed but others are restricted which is what was done by Daniel and John the Baptist (Matthew 3:4)
(Susan Gregory, The Daniel Fast)
I am doing the Daniel Fast but I am doing a modified version. I am giving up meat, dairy and all animal by-products, leavened breads and all drinks except water. But the Daniel Fast as strictly interpreted by Gregory, also calls for no processed foods or chemicals. I can't realistically be successful with this. I have prayed about this and talked about it with a good Christian friend and we agree--God knows my heart. I will read labels and do my best but with limited time and income to purchase some of the items in her recipes, I'm just going to be eating a lot of salad, potatoes, brown rice and flatbread! I'm still giving up a lot of FOOD!
My pastor also gave the following outline for doing a fast:
- Set an objective.
b. Ask for forgiveness
c. Refocus on the eternal
d. Invite the presence of God in our lives
e. Believe God to answer specific needs.
2. Decide what type of fast you will do.
3. Expect results
Isaiah 58:8-9
Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your holiness[a] will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. “If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
We also have a corporate prayer focus by day:
Sunday - Our Hearts
(2 Chronicles 16:9) For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the
earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.
Make worship and prayer the priority of your life. Declare your complete dependence on God. Ask for a renewed passion for His presence and fresh revelation of His Word.
Monday - Our Purpose
(Colossians 1:28-29) We proclaim him, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. To this end I labor, struggling with all his energy, which so powerfully works in me.
Our purpose is the Great Commission. Pray for people to be saved, connected in a local church, discipled, and fulfilled in their ministry.
Tuesday - Our Nation, State, and City
(1 Timothy 2:1-2) I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone--for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness.
Pray for America and the leaders of our country. Pray for Alabama and the cities of Birmingham, Auburn, Tuscaloosa, and Montgomery. Pray for the Governor, the state legislature, courts, mayors and other city
officials, schools, police departments, and churches.
Wednesday - Our Points of Passion
(Matthew 9:37-38) The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask
the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.
Pray for our local missions efforts (Dream Center and prisons), national church planting (ARC), and our international missions efforts.
Thursday - Our Family
(Acts 16:31) Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved--you and your household.
Pray for God's blessing on your family (spouse, children, grandchildren, grandparents, parents, brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins, etc.)
Friday - Our Needs
(Philippians 4:6-7) Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Believe God for answered prayer to your specific needs (finances,relationships, health, family members to be saved and other personal needs.)
Saturday - Our Church
(Ephesians 3:20-21) Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Pray for Church of the Highlands and the ministry that will take place this year. Pray for Pastor Chris and his family, along with the other staff members, small group leaders, and those on the Dream Team.
We have services every weekday morning at 6 a.m. and Saturday morning at 9 a.m. (also streamed live online but I'm going to make every effort to actually get up and go!)
As for my specific needs, I am believing that God will show me:
1) in which direction I should steer my heart with regard to dating/relationships. Should I continue to hope for reconciliation? Or should I open my heart to receive a new, Christian mate, if that is what God has for me? Or do I need to continue to wait on this issue?
2) in which direction I should steer my body for healing in my knees. Should I continue with traditional western medicine? Or seek the help of a chiropractor or acupuncturist? If I stick with western medicine, do I continue with shots or give into surgery? But I do believe it's His plan to heal them so I can lose more weight and be healthy enough to serve Him in radical ways (yes, I'm starting to feel a calling coming on)
3) in which direction I should steer myself with regards to my job. I'm committed to being here until the end of February at least because first, I don't want to make any major decisions or changes during the fast and second, I want to get at least six months of this "temporary assignment" for purposes of longevity in a court proceeding. But after that, do I continue here because it's relatively low stress and provides time for me to work on study or do I start to pursue other opportunities and if so, which ones?
4) how to become a more disciplined tither and to gain better control over my finances. For the first time in a long time I've moved from "struggling, living paycheck to paycheck" to "survival, living month to month" and that feels good but not good enough. I am attending the Financial Freedom conference at church Saturday and have been promised to come away with a written plan of action that is doable. So that's a start!
Those are the main things. It's important to note that a fast doesn't change God's mind about something. I used to think that was the case--people fasted in order to get something from God. But it's about aligning our spirit with His Holy Spirit. And I would covet your prayers to see that this happens.
Be blessed!
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
New Year's Eve and Hopes for 2014
So I ended up having dinner with the ex last night, hanging out with my daughter for a bit and then watching a football game until I fell asleep on the couch. I woke up at 12:03 a.m. to the neighborhood kids shooting off fireworks, smiled to myself and then went back to sleep.
For many reasons, I decided to avoid going to any parties. I had considered one because it was supposed to be doubling as a going away party for the bestie. But she and I went out for dinner and coffee the other night and I will see her today before she leaves, I hope. Partying is just not who I am anymore. I have no desire to be around a bunch of smoke and people acting drunk and crazy. I have no problem with alcohol consumption in and of itself. I just choose not to for myself at this point in my life. But last night, I knew it would be over the top and didn't want to risk being on the roads with others that haven't learned the lesson of drinking and driving. I learned it the hard way a few years ago. Thankfully, I didn't hurt anyone (just myself and my brand new car) and I didn't go to jail. I really wish others would realize that they NEVER think they are too drunk to drive but it really doesn't take that much to alter your judgement, slow your reflexes and reaction time and dull your senses. I doubt many people will get it though until they are involved in something like was. Already, I've seen on the news a hit and run accident that happened last night and if I were a betting person, I'd be willing to bet that the reason the other driver fled the scene is because they had been drinking. Nonetheless, I didn't mean for this to be a soapbox post about drinking and driving. I just have no desire to "party" like I used to and I am completely fine with that.
In the past, I would have been HORRIFIED to be sitting home alone on New Year's Eve. But it was actually pretty nice. I guess that's how God works. When you ask Him to change things, sometimes He changes you instead. I have never felt more at peace in my entire life. I don't need to party or be with someone to find validation in my life because I know who I am in Christ.
The ex and I had a wonderful time talking like friends do. I am glad for the relationship that we have. God is a god of restoration and I still don't know ultimately what His plan for us will be but for now, I am content with what it is. Completely trusting God. So this is what it feels like....wow! It feels amazing!
As I look back on 2013, I am glad to see it go. But I am also thankful for the lessons learned and the grace and mercy I have been shown, not just by God but by others as well. And for those that couldn't...I forgive you and pray that you find the peace that will allow you to let go of your anger, not just towards me, but the bitterness you must have in your heart that eats away and causes you to stay in spiritual limbo. I pray that you realize you don't hurt me or anyone else when you withhold forgiveness. It's like setting yourself on fire and expecting others to die of smoke inhalation. I know this because I have been where you are. Let it go, beloved, so that you can realize and receive all God has for you.
But I again, I digress. These are generally lessons people have to learn on their own and in their own time.
Not only was I shown mercy in 2013, but I was so blessed beyond what I deserve. God brought some amazing people into my life though Church of the Highlands small groups. Each has blessed me beyond what words can express. Not just in spiritual ways but practical ways as well and I am ever so grateful.
I tried to pay it forward when I got the opportunity to bless others. Met a new friend under the worst of circumstances. But we combined forces and pulled each other up out of the gutter and are both doing well. And it blessed me so much to bless her.
I finished both Divorce Care and LIFE and my first semester of graduate school with an A and two B's. My finances are greatly improving and though I still have my moments of craziness, I have a wonderful therapist and an amazing doctor that gives me the medication I need. (I don't mean to sound like I take anti-psychotic drugs or anything--I'm NOT that crazy! Well, sometimes! lol j/k But I am VERY thankful that God has given people the genius to figure out how to help those of us that have something organically wrong that we can't control or help.)
For 2014, I am beginning a Daniel Fast Sunday. For those of you that don't know what that is, it is basically a vegan diet with even more restrictions--no white flour products, no chemicals, sweeteners, leavened bread and only water to drink. Church of the Highlands does 21 days of prayer and fasting every January and this year, since I'm now ALL IN ;) I want to participate on the highest level that I can. Fasting is about denying the body in order to make the spirit stronger. And I am desperate to hear from God on so many things: relationships, dating, job, which direction to go to heal my knees, how and where He wants me to serve, and so many other things. I am ready to hear what He has to say. I am also looking forward to the health benefits. Though fasting should never be done as a means to lose weight, sometimes it is a bonus and it definitely would be a welcomed one! I will make no major decisions during this time, take no trips, make no purchases (other than what is necessary for life). I won't even cut my hair! I will wait on the Lord to direct my every step.
I know I will do another semester of Divorce Care and I may co-lead a LIFE group or at the very least repeat LIFE. I'll be taking three classes this semester and this time they are three classes that will require a lot of study! No gimme classes this time! The small groups won't begin until after the fast but classes unfortunately resume January 8. Nothing I can do about that. So I would covet your prayers during that time. But that is the only distraction I will permit.
I also want to consecrate this time for praying for others as well. Even though I always pray for others, I want to make my prayer time more fervent. So let me know how I can pray for you!
After the fast is over, I will better know a lot of things. I am believing God for healing so I can exercise and finally get this weight off. I am believing God for better control and direction over my finances (though He's done so much already), I am believing God to show me whether or not I should stay at my current job that isn't very stressful so I can concentrate my efforts on school or if I should pursue other opportunities. And I am believing God to direct my writing so that it serves Him. I want to publish my testimony and help other women that are struggling or have struggled in the same ways I have. There isn't much out there. But as always, His will, not mine. I'm even believing He will tell me what cars to purchase (Kayti and Brooke BOTH need one this year), furniture and even where, what and who to give to.
I know that 2014 is going to be a great year! Praying that yours is blessed as well!
For many reasons, I decided to avoid going to any parties. I had considered one because it was supposed to be doubling as a going away party for the bestie. But she and I went out for dinner and coffee the other night and I will see her today before she leaves, I hope. Partying is just not who I am anymore. I have no desire to be around a bunch of smoke and people acting drunk and crazy. I have no problem with alcohol consumption in and of itself. I just choose not to for myself at this point in my life. But last night, I knew it would be over the top and didn't want to risk being on the roads with others that haven't learned the lesson of drinking and driving. I learned it the hard way a few years ago. Thankfully, I didn't hurt anyone (just myself and my brand new car) and I didn't go to jail. I really wish others would realize that they NEVER think they are too drunk to drive but it really doesn't take that much to alter your judgement, slow your reflexes and reaction time and dull your senses. I doubt many people will get it though until they are involved in something like was. Already, I've seen on the news a hit and run accident that happened last night and if I were a betting person, I'd be willing to bet that the reason the other driver fled the scene is because they had been drinking. Nonetheless, I didn't mean for this to be a soapbox post about drinking and driving. I just have no desire to "party" like I used to and I am completely fine with that.
In the past, I would have been HORRIFIED to be sitting home alone on New Year's Eve. But it was actually pretty nice. I guess that's how God works. When you ask Him to change things, sometimes He changes you instead. I have never felt more at peace in my entire life. I don't need to party or be with someone to find validation in my life because I know who I am in Christ.
The ex and I had a wonderful time talking like friends do. I am glad for the relationship that we have. God is a god of restoration and I still don't know ultimately what His plan for us will be but for now, I am content with what it is. Completely trusting God. So this is what it feels like....wow! It feels amazing!
As I look back on 2013, I am glad to see it go. But I am also thankful for the lessons learned and the grace and mercy I have been shown, not just by God but by others as well. And for those that couldn't...I forgive you and pray that you find the peace that will allow you to let go of your anger, not just towards me, but the bitterness you must have in your heart that eats away and causes you to stay in spiritual limbo. I pray that you realize you don't hurt me or anyone else when you withhold forgiveness. It's like setting yourself on fire and expecting others to die of smoke inhalation. I know this because I have been where you are. Let it go, beloved, so that you can realize and receive all God has for you.
But I again, I digress. These are generally lessons people have to learn on their own and in their own time.
Not only was I shown mercy in 2013, but I was so blessed beyond what I deserve. God brought some amazing people into my life though Church of the Highlands small groups. Each has blessed me beyond what words can express. Not just in spiritual ways but practical ways as well and I am ever so grateful.
I tried to pay it forward when I got the opportunity to bless others. Met a new friend under the worst of circumstances. But we combined forces and pulled each other up out of the gutter and are both doing well. And it blessed me so much to bless her.
I finished both Divorce Care and LIFE and my first semester of graduate school with an A and two B's. My finances are greatly improving and though I still have my moments of craziness, I have a wonderful therapist and an amazing doctor that gives me the medication I need. (I don't mean to sound like I take anti-psychotic drugs or anything--I'm NOT that crazy! Well, sometimes! lol j/k But I am VERY thankful that God has given people the genius to figure out how to help those of us that have something organically wrong that we can't control or help.)
For 2014, I am beginning a Daniel Fast Sunday. For those of you that don't know what that is, it is basically a vegan diet with even more restrictions--no white flour products, no chemicals, sweeteners, leavened bread and only water to drink. Church of the Highlands does 21 days of prayer and fasting every January and this year, since I'm now ALL IN ;) I want to participate on the highest level that I can. Fasting is about denying the body in order to make the spirit stronger. And I am desperate to hear from God on so many things: relationships, dating, job, which direction to go to heal my knees, how and where He wants me to serve, and so many other things. I am ready to hear what He has to say. I am also looking forward to the health benefits. Though fasting should never be done as a means to lose weight, sometimes it is a bonus and it definitely would be a welcomed one! I will make no major decisions during this time, take no trips, make no purchases (other than what is necessary for life). I won't even cut my hair! I will wait on the Lord to direct my every step.
I know I will do another semester of Divorce Care and I may co-lead a LIFE group or at the very least repeat LIFE. I'll be taking three classes this semester and this time they are three classes that will require a lot of study! No gimme classes this time! The small groups won't begin until after the fast but classes unfortunately resume January 8. Nothing I can do about that. So I would covet your prayers during that time. But that is the only distraction I will permit.
I also want to consecrate this time for praying for others as well. Even though I always pray for others, I want to make my prayer time more fervent. So let me know how I can pray for you!
After the fast is over, I will better know a lot of things. I am believing God for healing so I can exercise and finally get this weight off. I am believing God for better control and direction over my finances (though He's done so much already), I am believing God to show me whether or not I should stay at my current job that isn't very stressful so I can concentrate my efforts on school or if I should pursue other opportunities. And I am believing God to direct my writing so that it serves Him. I want to publish my testimony and help other women that are struggling or have struggled in the same ways I have. There isn't much out there. But as always, His will, not mine. I'm even believing He will tell me what cars to purchase (Kayti and Brooke BOTH need one this year), furniture and even where, what and who to give to.
I know that 2014 is going to be a great year! Praying that yours is blessed as well!
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