I'm not even worried about it though because right now, my sweet friends, the Ferrill's are in China adopting their 8th (yes, I said 8th--4 biological and 4th one to be adopted) child from China. Sweet Kevin--you are so adorable and you are already one very blessed little boy. God has chosen the most wonderful family for you and there are SO many people praying you home and praying you well. Our God is an AWESOME God.
The Ferrill's story has given me so much encouragement and even more of a heart for children than I already had. I used to say in high school that I didn't care whether I ever had children of my own--I wanted to adopt several from around the world. Well, God gave me three blessings and they are all miracles, each one of them and my heart is full. But if God opens the door one day for me to adopt, I will gladly walk through it. It used to make me sad that Jeff is not on board with the idea (and with good reason--we're broke! LOL Too ridiculous an idea to even dream about at this time.) But my God is so much bigger than "ridiculous" ideas. If He wants to make a way, He will. And if He doesn't, that's fine, too.
I've learned SO much this year about trusting God and just being at peace. I'm still at peace with the daycare closing and being out of a job in less than 4 months! I'm at peace with not starting my own business just now. I'm at peace with a 17 year-old van with no power steering and a Jeep that currently won't crank. I'm at peace that this isn't likely for us to move out of this cracker-jack box of a house. I'm at peace knowing that not everyone is going to like me or be my friend. I'm at peace with being overweight. I'm at peace with not having accomplished the financial goals that I'd planned to by now. I'm at peace with turning 40 in April! I'm at peace that I'll never be pregnant again. I'm at peace that taming my tongue will always be my biggest challenge and one very difficult obstacle to overcome. Finally, I've learned, I think, to let go and let God! Hallelujah! Sitting at the foot of the cross there really is NOTHING to be anxious about.
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Thursday, February 18--
I was writing this last night when I was interrupted by a phone call from my sweet friend and awesome dance teacher, Shalita. She called to let me know that sweet little Kevin was admitted to the hospital yesterday morning with low platelets. I'm not sure what that means exactly, especially given his already delicate condition. But I feel so blessed to be included in those that were called and asked to pray. What an honor! And what a privelege to pray for those REALLY in need. And even now, I'm not anxious. I KNOW God is in control!
Then this morning I wake up to the news that there was an earthquake in Beijing! LOL, sorry I know it's not really "funny" but I can't help but laugh at the devil. Your feeble attempts to thwart God's plans for this family and these children are NOT GOING TO WORK!! I can't even be mad because I KNOW God is there and that's why all this is happening. Fiddle dee dee--I'm downright JOYFUL! And it's an amazing feeling! What one means to use as destruction, God uses for something positive and may HE be glorified!
So this all brings me back around to what I was getting at earlier. I've decided that since I'm currently "non-denominational" anyway, I'm going to do something I've toyed around with in the past but never really done before. I'm observing Lent. Rather than "give up" something though, because I could never give up anything that comes close to what God gave up for me--His Son! I'm going to do something extra. Every day, I am going to pray for a different orphan. God put it on my heart a long time ago to help Him help these children. The stories and testimonies of my many friends and acquaintances have only served to reinforce that. And right now, this is the only way I can do it. But it's also the best way! I'm not going to spend a lot of time researching and "choosing" which ones to pray for--there are 147 million and only 40 days of Lent! I'm going to let God reveal them to me. He knows their names. He knows their every need. He's already got their problems solved somehow. I just need to let Him know that I love them, too.
Of course, every day, I'll be praying for Kevin until he is home and probably even after. But today, I'm also praying for Tristan. In their update on their adoption website, they asked for prayer for this special 18 month-old currently in the hospital in serious condition. Lord, I'm agreeing with my friends and people everywhere right now that this sweet little child receive your blessings. In whatever way you choose to heal him, Lord, please do it now. We know you are in control and we thank you for what you're gonna do!
Blessings!
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