And the Lord rested...

therefore, so will I!

I definitely need it. I'm still battling this crud, mostly at night so its affecting my sleep. But yesterday we also helped my sisters move--Mel moved out of my parents basement back into the house on Southside and Mia and Chris moved from the house on Southside into my parents basement. It was a long, exhausting day but fun, too. We always have fun together and the kids were a big help, too.





You can see what a big help they were riding on the handtrucks!


Later, we all watched the Alabama/Tennessee game---ROLL TIDE ROLL!!! 8 & O !!! and therefore missed our church's Fall Festival. Someone should think about the scheduling of these things! LOL And before you begin to lecture me on how my life should not revolve around a football game, save your breath. I know where my priorities are. Alabama football is a huge deal to us and one of the few things Jeff and I enjoy doing together. There are other Fall festivals, missing out a few pieces of candy is not a big deal and I try never to miss a chance to spend with my mom, dad and sisters.

My sister and her new husband had a Halloween party to go to later that night (yes, I'm showing my age--I could not believe the party didn't even start until AFTER the ballgame! lol) And yes, they are poor, misguided Auburn fans. Though dressing as Tommy Tubberville IS a good idea for a SCARY Halloween costume!



Today, we are taking it easy. Though I hated to miss church--AGAIN, I really really needed to rest. CBS will just have to count as my Bible study and worship time again this week. I doubt that we will even make it to choir/AWANA tonight, I'm THAT tired.

We are also catching up on laundry because a sweet lady from work gave Brooke a TON of clothes--really NICE clothes. So if you see my child dressed in Gap, Abercrombie, Aeropostale, Justice for Girls, please know that I did NOT win the lottery. I'm too cheap to buy those kinds of clothes but I am glad that God provides. Brooke is really excited about getting them and so we are running them through the washer/dryer today so she can try them on and see what fits.

Friday, my little dance class had their Halloween party and they were some of the cutest little princesses, cheerleaders and dragons ever! I LOVE teaching that class and I'm so glad to have two of the best student teachers to help me. Though one of them CONSTANTLY reminds me that I'm "not doing it right"! Little perfectionist. I can't get her to understand that Mommy learned all this stuff years ago and just because I learned it one way doesn't necessarily mean it's "wrong". Though it may well be. You never know, they constantly change the way they teach math and stuff maybe they've changed dance steps, too. I doubt it I think she just doesn't realize that teaching it and doing it are two different things when you are trying to break it down for little ones. Nonetheless, I do acknowledge how long it's been so I will be sitting in on Holly and Shalita's classes more often, just to make sure we're all on the same page. But I'm very proud of them and even though I see all of them during the week anyway, I'm very glad to have that little bit of extra time with them each week.


In other dance news...since we switched from Directv to Charter, I've lost all my Shimmy recordings. So I'll have to re-record them! Bummer!

On Friday, I managed to suck it up and get to Co-op even though I did not feel well. In my American Girl class, we dyed shirts to make Indian dresses for our "pow-wow" this week.





I also forgot that I never posted Pumpkin Patch pictures. They turned out very well depsite the fact that my batteries in my digital camera died on me and I had to make most from my camera phone.

Wow! We're really behind...

not!

We are moving right along, I just haven't had time to post it all. And being without internet throws a kinker in the online journaling system, too. I'll share some of all that we've learned very soon!

blah blah blah blah blah

blah is about how I feel right now. I can't kick this crazy cough and so I know I won't be able to get to sleep just yet so I may as well do something...like blog. But even though I can't sleep, I AM tired so these random thoughts are in no particular order...just a bunch of blah blah blah blah blah

We had a pretty good day today despite the cough. We went to CBS this morning and had our monthly bruncheon! You know if food is involved, I'm going to be there! And it was yummy. But also had a good time of sharing and prayer and that's what we're SUPPOSED to be there for!

Then we came home to catch up on some housework and schoolwork and I gave Brooke a piano lesson. She hasn't had one in a long time because usually, where piano is concerned, my teaching style and her learning style do not jive and so I've been wanting to find her another teacher. However, finances dictate that this is not a good time so I guess we'll both have to suck it up and deal with it if she is to stick with it and she loves it so I will give it my best shot. I'm not altogether sure how much further I can take her anyway though. I need to be practicing myself. I took lessons for 5 years when I was a kid but then quit to do other things (you know my adhd where activities are concerned--I want to do it all!) and then after getting married and not having a piano to practice on for years...well, I've sort of lost my touch. I can do the beginning to intermediate but she has a great ear and picks up on things rather quickly so I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to be her piano teacher. And she is just like me when I was a kid. I played by ear a lot, too and it drove my piano teacher NUTS. She wanted me to learn theory and how to read music and I just wanted to listen to something and then pick it out on the piano! Brooke is EXACTLY the same way. I'm trying to get theory across to her and she just wants me to show her how it goes and then she'll practice it nonstop until it's perfect. *sigh*

Anyhoo, my other musical child desperately needs to find a violin teacher because I can't help her with that at all. I can read her music and I can hold the thing and I can even tune it (except for the other day when I popped a string!) but after that... forget it. She really loved her teacher from last year but she is about to have a baby and the day just didn't fit our schedule this year. I also didn't feel like she was progressing like she should for whatever reason. The first year when she took lessons from the Alabama School of Fine Arts through Clay, she seemed to fly through the book. These last two years...not so much.

Dylan is also pretty musical and has been playing the drums some in the church's Youth Praise band. But there are so many drummers at our church already he doesn't get as much of a chance to play as he probably would like.

I've been following my friend, Laine's trip in China to get her new daughter Candace and folks, I have to tell ya--God is amazing!!! I so wish you could stand over my shoulder (sorry her site is private) and read what God is doing! You could not deny Him if you could. I can just feel everything through cyberspace it's so weird and I'm just overwhelmed with emotion. I can't wait for them to get back!

Tomorrow is a typical Thursday for us and Friday a typical Friday. We're supposed to help my sister move on Saturday and then Saturday night it's the Alabama/Tennessee game!!! ROLL TIDE ROLL!!!

Meeting Larry

I did meet bio dad a few weeks ago, for the first time in 28 years. I call him Larry. Most folks call him Wayne and my brother in sister call him Dad but I can't. He's not my dad. Lots of men can father a child but it takes a special man to be a dad. To me, he's just Larry.

He's much shorter than I remembered. I guess maybe I'm a tad taller??? It's weird because the last time he saw me, I looked EXACTLY like Kayti so I'm wondering if he got a weird sort of deja vu feeling when he met her but I didn't ask him. And I couldn't post pictures of that meeting because guess what? I didn't take any. I had actually planned to--I photograph everything, good and bad. But I totally forgot.

That day did not start out well for me. I could never get a peace about going through with the meeting for some reason and maybe I probably shouldn't have but I had decided I would anyway and it worked out okay. Now don't get me wrong, I HAVE forgiven him. But what most people don't understand about forgivenss is that often, it's a continual process. Sometimes I have to choose to do it over and over again. And forgiveness is not a feeling. It's not like you say, "I forgive you" and everything is all of a sudden hunky-dory. Nor does it mean I automatically trust him or anything like that. Forgiveness is usually more for the person doing the forgiving than for the one being forgiven. He realizes (at least he seems to and I hope he does) that our relationship starts over now. There was no bonding process from when I was a kid and he has to each day/week/month, build on whatever this is going to be. And that's something we'll both have to figure out. He knows he's not my "dad" and never will be as far as my heart and mind are concerned. But after having a mail and phone relationship for the past 8 years, I do recognize some good qualities and my faith tells me that everyone has the potential for redeemability.

All that said...

that morning I was NERVOUS. We were supposed to meet up in Ashville. I'd been told about an Native American festival they were having and had planned to take Brooke anyway as an American Girl related field trip. And him being part Native American and very into Native American things, I knew that would probably interest him, too.

So that morning I'm running late as usual. We were supposed to meet at 10 and he calls at 10:01! Ugh! Look, bud, I waited on you for 28 years, I think you can give me a few minutes--is what I felt like saying. But I didn't. But I should have. Because he kept calling every ten minutes until we finally got there an hour later (we got lost looking for the stupid festival that had been cancelled!) and about 20 minutes before our arrival I started having a major--I mean MAJOR anxiety attack. I could not breathe. We had to pull over and I had to get out of the van and walk around and catch my breath. Then I just completely lost it. Jeff was trying to comfort me and get me back in the car and I just said, I can't do this, I can't do this. So Jeff asks me what do you want to do, do you want to just go home. But I couldn't bring myself to do that either so I just prayed, "God, please. I was angry with him for so many years and you told me to let it go. You blessed me with a REAL father, the kind that sticks around through the hard stuff as well as the fun stuff and is STILL there for me no matter what and You, God, You have reminded me that You are my Heavenly Father so no matter what earthly fathers do (and they do come and go sometimes), You are always there. So I let it go so why do I now feel like this. I just need some peace or some clear direction."

Well, I got a little calmer but I don't know that I ever got a 'clear sign from God'. I think maybe sometimes God says, "Hey, you've earned the right to make this choice, so I'm gonna let you make it." So I did. I didn't want it hanging over my head any longer--I wanted it out of the way. So if he wants to earn his way back he can begin and if not, well, whatever.

And once we got there and I saw him, I felt ridiculous for agonizing so much. He was just a man. An old man. An old man who missed out on so much for nearly 30 years. But an old man who knows that and would do anything to get it back. So we shall see. We spent the next few hours at my house looking through picture albums and talking. He asked about several family members including my "mom and dad" and he talked with Jeff and Dylan about typical guy stuff and it was like having a friend over for a few hours. Or maybe not a friend--yet but someone you just met that seems interesting.

I don't understand how he can do what he did and I don't even think he understands. We all have regrets in life. Some just have bigger ones that others. Can a person ever overcome them? We shall see.

Some pictures...

Okay, so I didn't exactly make it back "in a bit". Sorry, doing the best I can here. This new high speed internet is like a new toy at Chrismtas in my house and all three blessings are fighting over it all the time. Guess who gets left last on the list? Yep, mom!

So here is Brooke after winning $100 AWANA bucks for wearing the most things of her favorite color. Wonder which color that is?



Brooke really cracks me up. She can be so creative sometimes, especially when playing. Here is a picture of her taking care of "Patty" who is "sick".



Check out Patty's "IV"! LOL Hysterical.


October 3, we got to go see Jon & Kate Gosselin at the Southern Women's Show. They are both very beautiful people and so funny (well, Jon is) and kate is just an amazing mom. I did not like her much when I first heard about her. The previews for their show are not very flattering. They always seem to catch her behaving badly. But I realized what really irked me were the things about myself that I did not like. And what mom (or anyone else) doesn't behave badly once in a while? Now I just love her and her family. They have an amazing outlook on life and parenting and while we didn't get close enough to actually "meet" them like Brooke wanted to, just getting this close to them was awesome.



Here are a few pictures from our church picnic:







Whose precious baby is this? I just can't remember why I took a picture of someone else's kid...hmmm!!! Could it be....

Ella Kate!!! Roll Tide, baby!



This beautiful child is Maggie, fussing at a yellow jacket for landing near her!

Our awesome Pastor and his beautiful family,




Pictures from our last homeschool group "Park n Play":







We took a field trip to Golden Flake and that was awesome. Anytime you get a chance to visit how your food is made, I suggest you do so! I was impressed with how clean the factory seemed to be (I expected much worse) and it blows me away how much production goes into a single bag of chips. Almost seems not worth it if you ask me but like Lucky on King of the Hill says, "You ain't tasted nothin' till you've had a chip off the line." hehe







and no, the girls were NOT thrilled to be wearing those hats! But for the free chips we got to take home, it was worth it.

Afterward, we had time to kill before we could pick Dylan up from school so we went to the Birmingham Museum of Art where they are currently hosting the DaVinci exhibit. It was amazingly impressive. I enjoyed the short film about the search for the lost DaVinci and how they are using modern technology to uncover it (they believe it was painted in a room with other paintings and a later artist put a wall over it and painted a painting of his own. They don't want to disturb either painting. So they are using some high-tech microscope thingy to see what's behind it!






A few from our camping trip...which turned out to be only a hike, picnic and day at the park (long story)









Kayti's Builders Club performed a talent show for the residents of a Cook Springs retirement home. Kayti clogged. She is progressing extremely well in clogging this year.




And that's a wrap! For now, anyway. I'll post pictures of our Pumpkin Patch trip and be back later to catch up on all my thoughts and feelings later.

Blessings,

I'm baaacckkk!!!!

Posting here in the solice of my kitchen with my new cable internet! I have SO much to catch up on with my blog. We've been to meet Jon & Kate (from Jon & Kate plus 8), camping (well, sort of), to the Golden Flake factory, the DaVinci exhibit, performed in a talent show for some seniors, played at the park with friends, etc. I have pictures of all this to upload and post but for now, the kids are circling me like vultures waiting to get online so I'll come back and share that later.

I also met my bio dad for the first time in 28 years a few weeks ago.

Yesterday, we had some awesome family pictures made by our friend, Jenny and I should have them ready to show you by next week.

I have been sick with bronchitis or some kind of crazy hacking cough so I haven't felt like doing much else but I did manage to sew the girls some new shirts to wear to our pumpkin patch field trip tomorrow.

Today, I'm lounging around until time to go to church this evening. Be back with pictures in a bit!

Still without internet...

I'm at the library and the kids are nagging to go play in the park so I'll have to make this a "quick" Quick update (ha ha), knowing I'll almost certainly leave something out...

I cannot get internet through directv where I live. And I'm having issues getting a wireless card from Verizon. I have to purchase the card outright instead of adding it to our account. At least that's what the website is telling me. I'll have to call or go in the store and find out for sure (and I hate doing that--I don't like talking to salespeople)

But I'm having serious blog withdrawals! I may have to break down and get my landline back! (not!)

God has really been speaking to me, though. The same Scriptures and thoughts keep popping up for me over and over but I'm not sure what it all means just yet. It could mean so many things...

Jeff interviewed for a new job last week and it went very well. We haven't heard anything yet so please keep praying that God will answer our prayers for him to be fulfilled in his work.

My job is still going great and I love teaching dance on Fridays. Co-op and CORE are still good.

We've been a little under the weather and have missed CBS for the last two weeks but we ARE keeping up with our homework, for the most part!

We have a pretty big weekend coming up. We are planning to go to the Ashville Indian Festival and I may even be meeting my bio-dad there for the first time in 28 years. I am nervous but I know I can't put it off any longer. He is working and living in Blount County and so far seems to be doing well with his release. I would covet your prayers for wisdom, discernment and just an overall peace that God is going to work everything out. There are SO many issues here, that even if I had time to blog about them all, I'm not certain I could properly convey all the emotions, feelings, and facts. Just pray. Please pray.

Sunday is our church picnic and at the last minute I turned in our reservation card. I still have moments of uneasiness around certain people at church and knowing that Jeff will almost certainly not be coming along makes me all the more anxious about that outing. But I know the kids will enjoy it.

Friday night Kayti has another ballgame. We missed the last one because of her attitude which is still a problem at times. Anyone thinking about having children should take a few teenagers for the weekend, forget about practicing on babies! Babies and toddlers are pie compared to hormone and head-strong teens! That's not to say that they still wouldn't have kids. But they would at least approach the topic more objectively! lol My mother says I'm paying for my raising! ha ha

Next weekend we are planning our Fall Family Camping Trip. I think we are going to Tannehill this time. The girls and I went a few years ago and it's absolutely gorgeous in the Fall.

I spent today working on some sewing and art projects and now I need to get home and clean my house!

Hope to catch up some more very soon and post some pictures!

Blessings,