A New Year...

I am so excited for 2012 and so glad to see 2011 go!

A recap of 2011:

I broke my marriage vows and got a divorce.
The girls and I moved--three times!
I experienced domestic violence first hand.
I bought, then promptly totaled a car.
I had a nervous breakdown.
I got involved in some less than desirable relationships.
I severed ties with a few "friends".
I changed jobs.
I sent my baby boy off to college.
I stopped homeschooling the girls.
I had severe family relationship drama with mom and sisters.

Here is a note I shared on facebook about my feelings for 2011:

I have always loved New Year's and this year, I plan to make it extra special.
New Years means new beginnings. Second chances. Everyone gets to start over. For me, this means EVERYTHING right now. In 2011 I made SO MANY mistakes. Some destroyed my marriage, some almost destroyed my family and others almost destroyed me. At the very least, they turned my life, my kids' lives and other peo9ples' lives completely upside down.
At times, the changes were exhilierating and exciting. Other times, they were downright depressing and chaotic. But we survived (thank God) and I learned SO MUCH about people, the world, circumstances and especailly--myself.
I discovered that there really are wolves in sheep's clothing. I discovered that the devil does exist. I discovered that we reap what we sow, that people will treat you how you ALLOW them to treat you and that you can't save some people...not even from themselves.
I discovered that some people are only your friends as long as you are doing what they think you should. Some, only as long as you keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself. But a few are ALWAYS ALWAYS your friend and then some people show up from out of nowhere to encourage you, pray for you, help you, even shelter you.
I discovered that it is vitally important to pay attention to my own physical and mental health, that sometimes it's not circumstances and situations--sometimes its medications that need changing! I discovered that my Lord and Savior is faithful, loving and forgiving even when His followers sometimes arent. And with His help, I discovered I had strength far beyond what I ever thought I had.
I am on my way back but not as I was before...as someone even better! I will keep moving forward knowing that I am who God says I am, I have what He says I have and I can do what He says I can do. I know EXACTLY what I deserve and I WILL NOT settle for less than that when I know God intends to bless me beyond that. I have SO MUCH to be thankful for and to look forward to and have every reason to be even more positive than ever.
So while I am thankful for 2011--even the bad stuff (and there was a LOT)--and all that I learned, I am ready for it to go! Bring on 2012, I am ready to apply all that I learned and go confidently in the direction of my dreams!
Thanks so much to each and every one of you who helped propel me and will be with me to see what God has in store for us! I love you!

Christmas 2011

We had a WONDERFUL Christmas. I needn't have been so anxious about all of it--about it being different. There were some differences, obviously but it was still very nice.

We did go to my mom's and she had cooked the traditional dinner and it was scrumptious as always. She didn't have a tree, however. She hasnt enjoyed putting it up since Maw Maw died but always managed to somehow. I'm not even going to worry about why she decided not to this year but she had told us we wouldn't. We were not going to let her get away with it...



haha

We enjoyed spending time with Cooper...



and Liam...



and Chloe...



And everyone was nice and there was no fighting.

We went home and got ready for Santa just like we always did...Jeff stayed over and waited with me. It was nice. I am very thankful that we have the kind of relationship we do. Its amazing considering everything...I am glad that we were able to give the kids at least one more "normal" Christmas. Not sure if there will be anymore.

The kids were elated and surprised with their gifts but all too soon it was time for them to go to their dad's for Christmas with that side of the family. I know it sounds horrible to say but I dont miss that at all. I got some much needed time to myself for a few days. The girls came back sooner than expected because Jeff's mom was sick (surprise surprise) and I think they were glad. I think they are used to being there now but now that we have a place of our own, I know they are MUCH happier being "home".